San Fran-a-lot

To answer a question: Yes, Mom, Alcatraz was "liberating." dot dot dot.

But seriously. A more accurate sense of liberation would be the one my stomach has experienced.

Witness:
(oh, my...I hesitate to write this downs) downs? yes downs.
So because of writing inadequacies of the moment, foodtime ingestions will be summarized as: Many forms of cow, fish, crustacean, and pig. And they were delicious.

okay.

..
are you curious yet?

...

there were...eyeballs, some brainz (I HAVE GONE TO THE ZOMBIE SIDE OF THE FORCE), some (beef) liver, heart, clam, crab, sweetbreads, cheese, salami, tuna, bread, VINO, rum, gin (!), IN-N-OUT BURGER wif Aminal fries, fish taco, beer (local and non), SEA SALTED FUDGE BROWNIES (I wish I could be sea salted. That sounds exotic), "special" meatloaf...wait, what was in this meatloaf, friend? Answer: chicken livers, pork, veal, pistachios, prunes, milkbreadeggsthymeblahblah what did I ask for the whole recipe darlink no i do not need a comma you nazi typing whore. russian crazy bitch. AND GODDAMMIT STOP SNORTING. (no you do not laugh too loudly. Only your mother would say such a thing.) OYSTERS! (it was a wee one. and my was it taystie)

KAMILLA'S MOTHER IS STOMPING! DA, DARLING!

More lazing now.
Mmm vacation.

Lessons learned:

San Francisco is a fog magnet. (and a pretty one at that)
Graffiti is encouraged in the Mission District.
You should always "Take your chances"... and "collect" tattoos.
Bourbon and cornflakes CAN BE (in) ICE CREAM
You really can't escape eating chez les Khaydarov. ("We're Jewish. That's just not happening.")
Sea lions smell BAD. like raunchy armpit. ick.
That scratch on the car? It's not from an accident after too many cocktails. No, it's not. (and it wasn't too many cocktails...Only two... wait, two is what we told her father...Only three. Three cocktails. Cockatiels... We took our chances)...
Birds are protected on Alcatraz Island. And "Rangers" want to tell you ALLL about them. Anyone whose title is "Ranger" makes me wonder where and how you get a title like that. And makes me distrust your authority. Really, Ranger just makes me think of a raccoon I used to be familiar with when I was ten. And by that, I mean I was not "hiking the Appalachian Trail" with this raccoon...I just read about his exploits in Ranger Rick. Exploits? Who is this Raccoon? Why is he capitalized?
Most men in SF are gay. And hence unattainably cute.
This is food heaven. Heaven for foodies, rather. Because for food...this is its worst nightmare. This is where food comes to be 'et.
I should not talk to people from Tennessee when Milla is in my presence. Because I *will* get made fun of. I'm sorry if when I talk to Bree..(-ie? -eigh?) I have to respond to her accent in kind. It's just natr'l! And polite. I can't wait to go back to the S'th and have some s'p on the c'ch. I hurt my toe. 'ch!
Spam-a-lot is one of the best and most entertaining musicals. Thanks for getting it in my head for FOREVER, itunes.

This is maybe too many lessons for one post. maybe. I hesitated right there. FAMILY TIME! (we stayed home today aaand laaazed. Father is skeptical of unproductivity.) kai bai.

Love from San Francisco/San Jose/Campbell, CA.